The Hobbit Read-Along, Chapter Three

Before we start on Chapter Three, I must direct our attention to the picture on the right (click to enlarge) a reaction on twitter to the hobbit trailer. There really isn't enough fail in the world!

Previous chapters: Introduction | Ch1 | Ch2 |

"O!" said Bilbo, and just at that moment he felt more fared than he ever remembered feeling before. He was thinking once again of his comfortable chair before the fire in his favourite sitting-room in his hobbit-hole, and of the kettle singing. Not for the last time!

Poor old Bilbo thinks many things “not for the last time”.

Not long after, Gandalf says

"Also it is very necessary to tackle the Misty Mountains by the proper path, or else you will get lost in them, and have to come back and start at the beginning again (if you ever get back at all)."

Um, why? I was under the impression that people could just turn and head in the direction of a path and come across it once again. What is it about these mountains means that you cant walk sideways and can only trace and retrace your own steps? See, this is exactly the sort of nonsensical thing you find in pure fantasy books which irks me and throws me out of the story! I call them 'WTF?' moments.

Next they stay with some elves, who we are told dwarves don't like. Nevertheless, there doesn't seem to be any animosity between then, no dwarf even questions the decision to stay at an elves home, nor do the elves show any doubts over paying host to dwarves. I'm not quite sure why we were told of the animosity when we were then shown that there isn't any.

The elves also tell them that the sword Thorin took from the trolls hoard is a Orcrist. For some reason I don't know, this seems to be important. The elves also discover some additional writing on their map. The writing may be important as it says that the hidden entrance in the mountain that was once home to the dwarves can only be found on one day a year, the dwarves new year to be exact. Sadly the dwarves are no longer able to tell when this falls.

"The first day of the dwarves' New Year," said Thorin, "is as all should know the first day of the last moon of Autumn on the threshold of Winter. We still call it Durin's Day when the last moon of Autumn and the sun are in the sky together. But this will not help us much, I fear, for it passes our skill in these days to guess when such a time will come again."

Really? REALLY? Cos our human ancestors had no trouble telling the time of the year, in fact many of our celebrations were centred around specific days and changes in the seasons. While I have a handy calendar these days, it surely can't be that hard if our ancestors could tell the day and date without even so much as a compass to help them!

Finally after 2 weeks of rest and not doing much (so we are told) as though to prove that there is no animosity between dwarves and elves, the elves restock the dwarves supplies, give them handy bags to carry everything in and then the dwarves, Bilbo and Gandalf continue on their way.